Thursday, May 03, 2007

The Supreme Being Teaches Spider-Man How To Be In Love: The Blog Post

A certain whimsical, very ladylike, somehow faintly unicornesque friend of mine (pictured above wearing a delightful little headpiece!) told me today when I ran into her at the bus stop on campus that I look like one of the Beatles. I believe she specifically used the term "mop-topped." My hair has gotten long, but I think there's one specific difference in the state of my hairyness as of the last couple of days that really put that image in her head:

I shaved my beard.

It was just... it was time, you know? I'm a little sensitive about it right now, so I'd appreciate it if you didn't tell me I look five years younger. I already know. I look like a spry lad of eighteen. It's a little ridiculous.

Know this: I shaved to sacrifice. What is gone now will only grow back stronger, fuller, thicker, fuller-bodied.

I know I only spent four months with that beard, but that four months was the beard's whole life.

Semper fi, good buddy. Semper fi. I salute you.


Tomorrow night, 11:59 pm: Spider-Man 3. It's happening. I haven't been this excited about a comic book film since... well, probably since Batman Begins, and I realize that wasn't so long ago, but that one set the bar pretty high. Did I ever tell you that I happen to think Begins is the best comic book movie of all time?

I mentioned that today at work and one of our courtesy clerks disagreed, claiming Sin City to be the best comic book film ever made. I was too tired from four hours of sleep and exhaustive mediocre-paper-writing* to argue the distinction that I'd call Sin City a graphic novel movie, whereas Spider-Man is definitely a comic book. But, look, here, I just said it. Trish! If you're reading this, then, um... there!

Anyway, to commemorate my excitement on the eve of the release of the final third of the Spider-Man trilogy (the one with motherfucking Venom!), here's a pretty well-done, actually funny Spider-Man-related Comcast commercial. My roommate Julia's collection of Spider-Man memorabilia totally puts that dude's to shame, though.

Red-and-blue-webbed shame.


*The paper I wrote is titled "Against the War in Vietnam: an American Cinematic Tradition." Baron von Bullshit Rides Again, anyone?


Post a Comment

<< Home